Malaysian visitor at the immigration office.
UK Immigration Officer: Purpose of visit?
Visitor: I'm here to study law, sir.
Officer: You know, you must have a lot of lawyers in Malaysia .
Visitor: Why do you say that?
Officer: Well, I've been here for a good twenty years, and I'd say 80% of Malaysians I see here say they're here to read law.
Visitor: Oh, really? That's really something I never knew. Hard to believe in fact.
Officer: Just you watch, then. You just stand here until the next Malaysian comes along, and I'll bet he's here to read law.
*Visitor waits for 5 mins, Ah Chong from Malaysia comes to immigration counter*
Officer: Mr. Ah Chong, purpose of visit?
Ah Chong: Study lorr...
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
O.O
One day, Ah Choy & Ah Seng were walking down the Chinatown when they saw something in their path.
"Wait!" cried Ah Choy.
"Wat is dat ho?"
"Yah ho! Be carefool lo," warned Ah Seng.
"Wat is it?" They approached the thing and looked at it very closely. "Eee.. look like s*** lah!" say Ah Choy.
"Hmmm..smell like * also!" say Ah Seng after taking a deep breathe.
Ah Choy then poked the thing with his one finger, raised the finger to his lips, tasted it and said, "Tastes like s***!"
Ah Seng pushed his finger right through the thing and stick out his tongue to lick. With confident, he said, "Confirm is s***!"
Then they smiled at each other, "Wah! lucky we didn't step on it."
=,=
anyway, this cat is cute~
"Wait!" cried Ah Choy.
"Wat is dat ho?"
"Yah ho! Be carefool lo," warned Ah Seng.
"Wat is it?" They approached the thing and looked at it very closely. "Eee.. look like s*** lah!" say Ah Choy.
"Hmmm..smell like * also!" say Ah Seng after taking a deep breathe.
Ah Choy then poked the thing with his one finger, raised the finger to his lips, tasted it and said, "Tastes like s***!"
Ah Seng pushed his finger right through the thing and stick out his tongue to lick. With confident, he said, "Confirm is s***!"
Then they smiled at each other, "Wah! lucky we didn't step on it."
=,=
anyway, this cat is cute~
Saturday, October 25, 2008
o.O
一封老板看了会晕倒的履历表
Name: Ah Boy
Age: Still young
Sex: Never. Still under age
Religion: I only have experience praying my cat who dead 2 years before
Race: I love to race, how you know?
Nationality: I don't like National, I prefer Sanyo
IC Number: 6735
Telephone number: House no telephone
Hand phone number: 3310
Address: Penang Jelutong
City: Nor Haliza?
Postcode: I never post anything
State: In my family, I am 2nd
Country: I love to travel to Canada
Marriage status: Secret
Email Address: Hotmail
Education Background: My teacher said not bad
Working experience: Last time got sell pirated VCD
Father's name: Daddy
Father's IC: You ask him
Mother's name: Mummy
Mother's IC: You ask her
Current Salary: Depends on my daddy mood
Expected Salary: As much as you can pay
When can start work: Depends on my mood
Highest qualification: Ya, very high
Grade: Ya, very high
College/University: College
Signature: Can I use chop?
Name: Ah Boy
Age: Still young
Sex: Never. Still under age
Religion: I only have experience praying my cat who dead 2 years before
Race: I love to race, how you know?
Nationality: I don't like National, I prefer Sanyo
IC Number: 6735
Telephone number: House no telephone
Hand phone number: 3310
Address: Penang Jelutong
City: Nor Haliza?
Postcode: I never post anything
State: In my family, I am 2nd
Country: I love to travel to Canada
Marriage status: Secret
Email Address: Hotmail
Education Background: My teacher said not bad
Working experience: Last time got sell pirated VCD
Father's name: Daddy
Father's IC: You ask him
Mother's name: Mummy
Mother's IC: You ask her
Current Salary: Depends on my daddy mood
Expected Salary: As much as you can pay
When can start work: Depends on my mood
Highest qualification: Ya, very high
Grade: Ya, very high
College/University: College
Signature: Can I use chop?
Saturday, October 11, 2008
十個看完九個瘋
disclaimer: read this only if u really have ntg else better to do start le lu.... 一天魔王抓走公主,公主一直叫. 魔王 :「你尽管叫破喉咙吧...没有人会来救你的....」 公主 :「破喉咙..破喉咙..」 没有人:「公主..我来救你了...」 魔王 :「说曹操曹操就到...」 曹操:「魔王..你叫我干嘛..」 魔王 :「哇勒..看到鬼」 鬼 :「靠!被发现了..」 靠 :「阿鬼,你看的到我喔...」 魔王 :「Oh,My God!」 上帝 :「谁叫我?」 谁 :「没有人叫你阿...」 没有人:「我哪有?装蒜啊!」 蒜 :「谁在装我?」 谁 :「又说我?你们找麻烦啊?」 麻烦 :「哪一个找我?」 哪一个:「找你?我才没有...咦,这儿有好多人.」 好多人:「我才刚到耶……你是谁?」 哪一个:「我才不是谁.」 谁 :「他才不是我.」 公主 :「大家都是来救我的吗?」 大家都:「我不是来救你的,是来看热闹的.」 热闹 :「我有什麽好看的?」 上帝 :「不关我的事,先走了.」 魔王 :「你回答一个问题再走,为什麽这麽多人救公主?我这个魔王怎麽演下去?」 下去 :「你好好的魔王不干,演我做什麽?」 公主 :「魔王若是没有人演,我就可以走了.」 没有人:「若是我演魔王,怎麽会让你走...」 怎麽会:「我才不让公主走,我要看热闹.」 热闹 :「看我干什麽?」 什麽 :「你居然要『干』我?流氓!」 你居然 :「我哪有?」 我 :「关我什麽事ㄚ?」 魔王 :「靠!我要疯了.......」 靠:「喊我干什么!...」 疯了 :「你要我干啥?」 你要我 :「我什麽都不知道ㄚ!」 我什麽都不 :「我哪知啊!」 我哪知 :「我在这里ㄚ!有人在叫我吗?」 有人:「我没有叫你啊!」 我没有:「谁叫他了啊?」 谁:「冤枉啊...我没有...」 我没有:「我可没冤枉你啊...」 你:「谅你也不敢.」 谅你:「谁说我不敢!?」 谁:「拜托啊...我什麽都没说啦」 我什麽都没:「你要我说什麽?」 我什麽都不:「...你...你不就是我那失散多年的兄弟吗?」 我那失散多年的兄弟:「拷...我名字取这麽长...也会被叫到啊...」 谁:「...我要赶快离开这个是非之地」 是非:「原来这里是我的地盘啊...」 我什麽都不&没:「你们别吵阿拉在讲话啦...」 你们别吵阿拉:「我没有在讲话啊...」 我没有:「我才没有讲话咧!...」 我什麽都不:「-_-...走...阿拉到外面去聊...」 走:「人家不好意思啦...(扭捏)」 我什麽都没:「关你屁事啊...闪啦...」(两兄弟生气的走出去) 关你屁事:「呜...为什麽赶我走...」 为什麽:「我没有要赶你走啦...乖...不要哭」 我没有:「喔...又关我啥事了」 关我啥事:「啥?有人叫我吗?」 有人:「谁要叫你啊...」 谁:「我真的要走了...T.T」 走:「人家真的不好意思啦...*V.V*」(谁不支倒地) 关你屁事:「...你不是我表妹吗?」 关我啥事:「...表哥...好久不见啦...」 好久:「我不是在这里嘛...」 魔王:「你们有完没完?」 完没完:「他才没有我」 你们:「我才没有他」 我才:「谁说的?」 谁:「叫我干吗?」 吗:「你居然要干我?」 你:「我才不会干他」 我才:「谁说我不会?」 谁:「冤枉!我没说……」 说:「叫我干吗?」 吗:「你们俩真不要脸!」 你们俩:「我要!我要!」 脸:「谁要我?」 谁:「我不要啊」 魔王:「快一点,再说我可要撵人啦」 人啦:「赶撵我?找K」 K:「谁找我?」 谁:「aaaaaaa!别提我的名字,再提我也K他!」 他:「别K我」 我:「谁要K我?」 谁:「终于让我逮找一个啦,杀呀…………」 一个啦:「别逮我」 我:「我也受够啦,谁再提我的名字,决不放过你!」 谁:「看我的降龙十八掌!」 我:「看我的九阴白骨爪!」 降龙十八掌:「我有什么好看的?」 九阴白骨爪:「我有啥好看的?」 什么好看的:「兄弟,我终于找着你啦!」 啥好看的:「哥,咱出去聊.」 魔王:「ma的...这是认亲大会啊. |
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